My personal mental journey came into focus when I suddenly lost my husband last year to cancer – it was quick, brutal, and devastating.

Nothing can really prepare you for losing someone you dearly love – Graham and I had been together 30 years and was truly my best friend.

Nearly a year on I can function, smile, laugh and build new memories with our daughter.

Grief is a journey and personal to those travelling along the road – there is no right or wrong way to go and often it can feel if you backwards more than forwards!

Below are some of things I have learnt on the way:

1. Take good care of yourself – I try to walk outside every day and use Health Shield for massages

2. Embrace the support of others – talking about a memory or sharing a particularly difficult day can really help

3. Surround yourself with people who care – it does not have to be family – I am surrounded by both my local friends and Realise ‘family’ too

4. Do not rush into major decisions, postpone them where you can – this one can be harder to learn – I did too much too fast and was exhausted – most decisions can wait at least 24 hours if not a week or two

5. Consider grief and bereavement counselling and support groups – I go to counselling once a month and it is sad, but it is good to see how far I have come and cry more if I need to

6. Take control of your new life – Remember it is okay to enjoy yourself again!

I am planning on running over 200km in seven days to fundraise for The Mental Health Foundation.

The events will last for about 26 hours each so I will be running and trekking with no sleep and in the British weather!

Running helps clear the head after a busy day, reduces stress, releases feel-good endorphins and a sense of achievement, boosts self-confidence, also the social and community side, there is a real togetherness in the running community and there is always support you never feel alone.

I have attended motorbike meetings from literally being a baby.

It was always my aim growing up to marshall at bike meetings when I was older, getting my bike licence was just an added bonus.

There is nothing better than being in ‘my happy place’ which is either at a motorbike circuit marshalling whilst riders race at up to 180mph or putting my helmet on, going out on the bike with no phone and just enjoying country roads.

I love my family but sometimes you just need a bit of me time. My motorbikes and marshalling give me my me time.

I sometimes struggle with my own mental ill health and find the best way for me to handle it is to talk.

I have a video call every morning at 7am with my sister and we discuss how we are, and what we have got planned to do today. It really does help to set me up for the day and puts me in the right frame of mind.

Secondly, I love anything creative and here are a few of the things I have made that help me to keep my mind occupied when I am not working.

If it wasn’t for the outdoors, I wouldn’t be sitting here as the person I am now today.

It brings me so much joy, happiness and you meet some amazing people who have the same outlook as you.

There’s no noise, and you can be at one with nature and just reflect, think and have time to yourself.

Being outdoors is refreshing, it allows me to feel free and, it challenges me. It helps me to manage my anxiety and keep it at bay.

If you are thinking of doing a walk or taking up hiking, just plan a route and go!

So, like everyone my mental health fluctuates here and there, and it took me a while to learn about my mental health to make changes, allowing me to have a more positive productive life.

I became aware that I have a silly short attention span, luckily for me the eight hours of work I do is extremely varied but outside of work I am very conscious of how I use my time and what I do.

I like to think of how I do my hobbies as a Mr. Ben approach (put on a new costume and just get on with whatever that costume relates to) I have loads of hobbies, nothing I am great at but everything I enjoy doing and learning.

In a week I usually go from cyclist to multimedia creative, to clothing designer, to a Twitch gaming and guitar streamer to Peak District hiker.

Make sure you have time to go out of your way and try new things, as I mentioned above, I am not good at these things and never thought I would do any of them, but now I put loads of time into each of these and feel great being able to swap with how I feel

I occasionally suffer with bouts of anxiety but I joined a gym three years ago and it really helps.

During lockdown our gym had to close but fortunately they moved onto zoom so we could exercise at home. I managed to build a little gym at home which I’ll go in in the morning if I’m working from home. It sets me up for the day and the whole thing keeps me on an even keel.

We have enjoyed hearing from our colleagues throughout this month and we will continue this project to ensure Realise is a safe place to work where everyone’s mental wellbeing is valued and considered.

Thank you to Alison, Claire, Charlotte, Lisa, Matt, and Kim for sharing their stories with us